Lynched #metoo moment

(NOTE: I keep revisiting this case because I think it’s important to alert authorities of improper conduct toward other human beings – whether it be sexual or psychological – and it still has not been addressed by those whose responsibility it is to investigate such matters. Thus, it is still unresolved.)

I’m having a #metoo moment, but not about sexual assault, but about psychological assault by a system that continues to stigmatize those who have a psychiatric diagnosis, including the top tier of that system – medical professionals who should know better. Like the #metoo movement, this is about the gross abuse of Power, the lengths someone will go to when challenged, the immense stigma toward already vulnerable populations, and suffering the consequences of that wrath. I believe we live in a system where this type of behavior is enabled, and that’s a frightening thought – when the system fails to address and treat an infection within the system.

In 2014, the Department of Justice/Americans With Disabilities (DOJ/ADA) division was interested in a complaint I had filed against Suburban Hospital in Bethesda, Maryland, regarding an experience I had there with an Emotional Therapy Dog, a delightful ShiTzu, while visiting a hospitalized patient. That experience interested the DOJ. They kept that file open for a year and an agent was in regular contact with me. Little did I know at that time, that I would become the subject of a complaint I never would have imagined, 2 years down the road. These are the only 2 complaints I have ever filed.

The traumatic experience at the GREATER BALTIMORE MEDICAL CENTER ER, took place in the Summer of 2015. The text of that complaint was documented and submitted through the website of the Americans With Disabilities Act Discrimination Complaint Form, and is provided below, including the automatic response and the reference number assigned this specific complaint, as well as acknowledgment of receipt of complaint. As of this date, January 30, 2018, I still have not received a response to this complaint.

The harrowing moment, described below, does not contain the details it should. Imagine a menacing nurse who is taunting you and trying to isolate you, and who is working at the behest of a doctor, whose ego has been bruised. When we reach the door, which they want me to enter, it doesn’t look like the door to an examination room. I’m still under the impression that my allergic reaction to a food I ate earlier is the reason for my return, but that impression rapidly fades when I see a man in the room who appears to be from Security. As soon as I enter the room, they lock the door. My friend has not been allowed to enter the room. However, there is a glass wall, and he can observe what is happening. They are trying to put me in the adjacent room, where they will presumably evaluate me, but that room has no windows, and I refuse to enter that room. Their arguments are not convincing. That is the moment when your Reasoning skills come to the forefront. Remember, these are very scary people. When they have no other choice other than to release me, they escort me, with my friend at my side, to the exit, as though I posed some sort of the risk – which if I had, they would have been able to restrain me, but they couldn’t – and when we reach the exit, the nurse makes a snide remark to my friend about my release.

COMPLAINT

GREATER BALTIMORE MEDICAL CENTER (GBMC)

“I was under the impression that I had filed the following complaint with the DOJ on July 23, 2015. However, I cannot find receipt of acknowledgment from your office. This is what I wrote on July 23, 2015, addressed to the ACLU, now edited to provide further details. This past week, I experienced a nightmare when I went in GBMC ER for an allergic reaction. I had been to the ER on Saturday night, suffering from heat exhaustion. The previous night, Friday night, Paramedics pulled me from my car and took me the Hopkins ER. On Saturday night, the symptoms of heat exhaustion were still present and my psychologist recommended I go to an ER other than Hopkins and I did. There, once the Attending Physician discovered I had a psychiatric diagnosis, left the room. A Fellow doing his Residence in Psychiatry, then came (I never saw the MD again) to discuss my psychiatric diagnosis, which is fine. That seemed to go well – at least that was my impression. The next night, however, was when the nightmare emerged and the sadistic behavior of the staff there was clearly visible. I had a systemic allergic reaction after I had eaten something and my hand became swollen. The same physician who had attended me the previous night also saw me that Sunday night. But before I saw him, a nurse attended me, and gave me 50 or 75 mgs of Benadryl to reduce the swelling on my hand. After that, a Physician’s Assistant saw me, and the first thing she said to me: “I can see that your Bipolar symptoms are exacerbated.” I looked at her and said: “What are you talking about? I’m here because of a severe allergic reaction.” My body was producing hives as we spoke. “Where did you get that information, about the exacerbation of my Bipolar symptoms? “It’s in your chart,” she said. “Really? And who put it in my chart?” The psychiatric resident,” she said. When the doctor arrived, I immediately addressed staff treatment of those with psychiatric diagnoses. He became hostile. And refused to examine my hand, and from a distance, called it a “superficial bruise.” Then, I said, there is no reason for me to be here. And I left, walked out. He didn’t stop me. A friend who was with me that night (an Epidemiologist) returned to the ER and discussed the reason why I was there. The Attending Physician then said, I could come back and be examined by another physician. However that is not what happened. I was tricked and escorted without my knowledge and locked in a ward with 2 security guards present and additional nursing staff. “What is going on?’ I said. They said they wanted to evaluate me. That is NOT why I returned to the ER. Furthermore, they had no right whatsoever to do this, as it was not the psychiatric diagnosis that was problem, but the allergic reaction that brought me to the ER. They had incarcerated me against my will, but in a most sinister fashion, through trickery and malice, because I had earlier challenged their treatment of psychiatric patients. If my friend had not been there, they had the power to hold me, a clear violation of my civil rights, and a dangerous breach of ethics. I demanded I be released, and they were forced to comply.

This type of behavior needs to stop.”

Americans with Disabilities Act Discrimination Complaint Form

Thank you for your complaint. Please retain and refer to the following reference number for any correspondence concerning this complaint:

16-1nz41-2u9a

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Untitled (Watercolor, 2018)

Untitled, 2018

The Human Imposter (Revision)

The Human Imposter

One day I discovered that where our tails had once been, scales now began to appear and develop. The rest of my flesh was still intact, but for how long? While most prefer to think in terms of evolution, I was forced to consider an alternative to orthodox doctrines – de-evolution. Could I be going backwards? How far had I evolved if this were, in fact, the case? Did I evolve into a worthwhile specimen?

Instead of ascending to higher planes, I was returning to that pool where everything – at least, in this world –

The Cosmic Soup.

And if that were the case, would that be the end, or would that merely begin the entire cycle again? And what would the journey backwards consist of? Would we use the same route going back?

But first, back to getting here …

If that were so, that would mean that at some stage, we were anything but human, our origins, unknown. Was there a hidden door, hitherto unknown, to becoming human – just when we thought we had figured out the puzzle, a piece would then dislodge the entire frame of thought? We could have been dogs, tigers, elephants or mastodons. But what would those who had become mastodons, for example, having faced extinction – what would become of them? Were they dead-enders?

If that were so, then how did that influence those others who became what we are?

The ones who completed the entire cycle? Would a person who had once been a tiger, for example, now be a danger to others? Who were the rats that populate our cities and countryside? Does any of this even make any sense?

If there were a door, or some other type of latch, whose existence we had not been previously privy to, this would then require yet another adjustment of scientific, moral and religious thought on a radical scale.

It seems that if this were so, we would have to rewrite biology (and other) textbooks, to explain the enormous shift in thought, to explain how this freshly picked bulb proved the entire body of knowledge and thought completely wrong. Everything would have to be reconstructed.

If that were so, then we could place each version side-by-side, and study the errors in thought we had made and how those errors yielded false conclusions. And we would always have to leave space for that knowledge we still did not possess, and may never possess – Ignorance, the knowledge of The Unknown.

Now that kind of job would interest me – reviewing the lineage of flawed ideas, knowledge, perceptions, and perspectives, and their application in the world we live in. But I fear this will not be possible, as I observe the transformation my body has embarked on, the rapid reversal from flesh into scales, has now reached my fingertips.

Dark Eyes, Dark Soul (Watercolor, 2018)

Dark Eyes, Dark Soul

“Dark Lines” Watercolor

Work-In-Progress

It’s been a while since I’ve had the opportunity to pick-up my brush and begin painting again. When this happens, I am often my harshest critic. And, as always, I begin with – not an idea – but with color. And then, I search for things within the color – What is there? Anything? And I take it from there. Not sure where I’m going yet with this one. Maybe somewhere. Maybe nowhere.

DARK LINES

The Hypocrite – Symptoms and Detection

The Hypocrite

Symptoms and Detection

The Hypocrite, unlike the Bureaucrat, who is a master of resistance, sees a fool in every room, and therefore has a lively and energetic mind, and is constantly engaging those around him or her, with constantly developing and evolving strategies, on how to best hide behind his or her duplicity, undetected. 

The Hypocrite, unlike the Bureaucrat, who has no need to be charming (indeed is adverse to any such notion, repelled by it) is the epitome of charm, always engaging and feigning interest, especially with those who may have reason to expose him or her for who they actually are. The greater the possibility for exposure, the more animated and engaging they become. The goal is to protect their secret, especially once it has leaked through the cracks of their fortified (or so they thought) tower, that tower, being the machinery we call the Brain, and attempt to plug the holes, which have rendered them vulnerable to ridicule. 

The Hypocrite cannot tolerate ridicule. The Hypocrite has painstakingly built whatever fortification is necessary to prevent such exposure. The Hypocrite combs his or her reputation with mathematical precision, to remove any knots (for there will be many) embedded in their carefully coiffed image. Indeed, they spend lots of time admiring and checking themselves in the mirror, to ensure their image has not cracked. 

Hypocrites can be found in all walks of life, but the most prolific ones are usually are at the top, so beware, lest you reach the top, and find yourself frequently admiring your reflection in the mirror, for some hitherto fool will certainly detect the cracks in that fine-chiseled visage of yours. 

The Human Imposter

The Human Imposter
Part 1

Beliefs

Evolution

Bugs

One day I discovered that where our tails had once been, scales now began to appear and develop. The rest of my flesh was still intact, but for how long? While most prefer to think in terms of evolution, I was forced to consider de-evolution as an alternative to orthodox doctrines. Could I be going backwards? How far had I evolved if this were, in fact, the case? Did I evolve into a worthwhile specimen?  
Instead of ascending to higher planes, I was returning to that cosmic pool where everything – at least in our world began – 

The Cosmic Soup. 
And if that were the case, would that be the end, or would that merely begin the entire cycle again. And what would the journey backwards consist of? Would we go back, using the same route? But first, back to getting here …

If that were so, that would mean that at some stage, we were anything but human. We could’ve been dogs, tigers, elephants or mastodons. But what would those who had become mastodons, for example, having faced extinction – what would become of them? Would there be a hidden door, hitherto unknown, to becoming human – just when we thought we had figured out the puzzle, a piece would then dislodge the entire frame of thought?  
Would they ever get here? –

Was there a door, or some other type of latch, whose existence we had not been privy to, and which would then require yet another adjustment?
Or would they simply stop and become Soup?  
If that were so, then how did that influence those others who became what we are? – 

The ones who completed the entire cycle? Would a person who had once been a tiger, for example, now be a danger to others? Who would the rats that populate our cities and countryside become?
It seems that if this were so, we would have to rewrite biology (and other) textbooks, to explain the enormous shift in scientific thought, to explain how this freshly picked bulb proved the entire body of knowledge and thought completely wrong. Everything would have to be rewritten. 
If that were so, then we could place each version side-by-side, and study the errors in thought we had made and how those errors yielded false conclusions. And we would always have to leave space for that knowledge we still did not possess, and may never possess – Ignorance, the knowledge of The Unknown. 

Now that kind of job would interest me – reviewing the lineage of flawed ideas, knowledge, perceptions, and perspectives, and their application in the world I live in. 

____________